Tag Archives: boys

Testosterone in London

GUESS WHAT.

I’m going to London! The acceptance letter came last week. I’m over the initial shock, but now it’s just terrifying that it’s real. I’ve never even been to Canada, so my first international experience will be spending four months in Europe. It’s kinda similar to someone wanting to try to play Tennis so, naturally, the next logical step would be to throw them into Wimbledon. I’m terrified, but totally psyched and ready to make metaphorical grunting noises when hitting the tennis ball of life.

Of course, I have to creep all over the Facebook group that the Study Abroad office set up for us and see who I am traveling with. Get this, of the fourteen people that have joined the group so far, ONE is male. Are you kidding me? WHY?

I wasn’t trying to make it my mission to find a dude while overseas, but COME ON. I chose not to apply to an all-girls college for a reason. I like boys, and I think I’ll like them even better while over the pond. I want them to pick up little English accents and I want to get drunk with them at pubs. I want to travel to other countries with them and share plates of linguini a la Lady and the Tramp. IS THAT TOO MUCH TO ASK?

Alas, the group is still adding people so I will just have to wait and see what other fine gentlemen pop up in my newsfeed. The creeping will be steady and frequent. I have no shame.

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Clothes are Terrible

I can’t even keep my pants up. It’s like this: I either keep my pants up with a belt and get a protruding denim bump near my crotch that looks vaguely phallic, or I skip the belt and get no bump, but I’m hitching my pants up every thirty seconds. I can’t win.

Meanwhile, females on campus pair skinny jeans with lacy combat boots and oversized sweaters and I could not even put that combo together if I had an entire Macy’s at my disposal. If wearing leggings, flannels, and Toms all day, everyday is wrong, then I don’t want to be right. 

I’m sure that guys find men’s flannels and Toms to be real boxer-droppers. That’s why they flock to me on such a regular basis. If only.

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